Fellow (and married) blogger Alex Wise from Loveawake left a nice post on Alpha Game outlining some marital advice. I thought it was good enough to copy here in its entirety. I thought it was good enough to copy here in its entirety.

1. Never hesitate to admit when you are wrong and apologize as soon as you realize that to be the case.
2. Never admit you are wrong when you believe that you are not. Stand your ground in the face of her tears and hold firm in the face of her anger. Never appease in the interest of short-term peace.
3. Learn to let things go. In every conflict, there is a point at which there is a choice between conflict and conversation. When you choose conflict, let your choice be a conscious one and not a reaction.
4. Encourage her when she decides to let things go rather than argue. Don’t take any passive-aggressive shots, don’t make any little comments or provide any ex post facto reminders. If she is willing to let it go, you should be willing to do the same.
5. Don’t expect her to hold herself to the same standards she holds you. Accept her failure to do so as a compliment to your sex and do your best to provide her with an example to follow.
6. Don’t let her get away with being dishonest. If her story changes, call her on it.
7. The sexual norms for your marriage are set in the first six months. Keep that in mind and behave accordingly.
8. Don’t be surprised if there is more relationship conflict than before you were married. The relationship dynamic and the daily patterns of life have changed and they are as new and unfamiliar to her as they are to you.
9. Both of you will have unconscious expectations of marriage that are unrealistic. Learn to let them go as they surface.
10. Remember that you are a team. If necessary, remind her that you are a team.

In the context of our community, Alex is a relatively outspoken believer in marriage (in particular his Christian faith demands it as an outlet for sexual activity and the proper rearing of children). What I like about Alex's list in particular is that it comes from a frame of masculine strength and accountability for the health of the marriage, not a shaming frame of “REAL MEN get married and respect!! their wives and you need to make her happy!” and on and on.

I take particular note of (1) and (9).

For (1): the Manosphere and game in general makes a lot of hay over the fact that beta, chumpy guys sometimes exhibit a trait of apologizing unnecessarily, and so an important motif is to become less apologetic – both verbally and in your own mind. But apologizing is not beta. Apologizing for things that aren’t your fault is very beta (point (2) in fact). Having the strength to say “I did this wrong and I’m sorry, now let’s move forward” and putting the relationship on a track to progress – and declining to be held repeatedly and incessantly accountable for your mistake – is good leadership and squarely alpha. (If your woman thinks that apologizing in any frame is cowering weakness, you need a new woman.)

For (9): I seem to have come with pretty good relationship skills out of the box, but one thing that came late to me was sussing out my own unconscious, unrealistic expectations, admitting them to myself and then when necessary to her. It really helped things for me to get serious about letting go of them, allowing my partner to be herself without competing against an imaginary Roxanne or Dulcinea.

Younger single guys and young women might not be aware, but older and married men get TONS of unsolicited marriage and relationship advice. A lot of it from women (“all you need is love!!”), some from beta-beaten married guys (“just say ‘yes, dear’ and save yourself the trouble”), or single guys projecting (“man, if I ever get married I’m going to put my foot down so I don’t become a chump like all my married friends”).

Guys like Alex Wise and Athol Kay fill a key niche of happily married, game-aware men who are able to articulate advice to men that can really work to keep their marriage happy and healthy for both parties. As you can see from Alex’s list, it’s relatively simple…but not easy. I still believe – based on a good number of successful acquaintances – that when you are with the right woman who can reciprocate your effort, it’s worth it.